The Five-Year Engagement picks up where most rom-coms leave off — with the proposal. Tom (Jason Segel) pops the question to Violet (Emily Blunt) exactly a year after they meet at a New Year’s Eve party. But it doesn’t go exactly as planned. Tom plans to surprise her with a ring on the deck of the restaurant where he works. But Violet objects so much to making a stop on their way to a party that Tom pulls over the car and confesses the whole plan. And thus begins their long and winding trip to the altar. But is their story engaging enough to make it worth a trip to the theater?

Jason Segal and Emily Blunt are likeable and fun as the engaged couple and at first it seems like everything is going to go off without a hitch. But what fun would that be? Things get derailed at first when Violet gets an offer to work on her doctorate at the University of Michigan. The problem with that is they live in San Francisco and Tom is an up-and-comer in the city’s culinary scene. But Tom decides to put his career on hold and go to Ann Arbor with Violet. She thrives there but he never seems to find his way. Instead, he ends up working at Zingerman’s Deli and hanging out with another bored faculty spouse  (well-played by the talented Chris Parnell) who knits ill-fitting sweaters and teaches Tom to hunt.

As the months tick by, the pressure mounts for them to set a date as grandparents start dying and Violet’s sister (Alison Brie) ends up taking the expressway to married life after she gets knocked up by Tom’s loutish friend (Chris Pratt) at Tom and Violet’s engagement party. But as Tom grows unhappier and Violet grows closer to her faculty adviser, the couple seems like they are headed anywhere but marriage. Tom’s downward spiral makes for some good laughs and Violet’s co-workers at the University are an amusing bunch. But there comes a point when you want to say, “oh just break up already!” The movie could have used some judicious editing to tighten things up a little bit.

So yes it’s worth the trip to the theater if you’re in the mood for a rom-com or if you’re a big Jason Segel and/or Emily Blunt fan. It’s got some good laughs and some honest emotional moments. It’s definitely chick flick territory. But if you’re the impatient type you might find yourself looking at your watch wondering when the hell they’re just going to figure it out.

In fact, if you saw Dear John, you may actually think you’re watching a remake of the same movie, only this time it’s starring Zac Efron (instead of Channing Tatum) as the war-scarred soldier (er, Marine) and Taylor Schilling (instead of Amanda Seyfried) as the blonde chick he falls for. And instead of a letter, there’s a photograph.

The plot doesn’t really matter much. It’s basically about a U.S. Marine (Efron) who serves three tours of duty in Iraq and is convinced his life’s been spared time and time again because of a good-luck charm in the form of a photo he found resting in the desert sand after a particularly brutal ambush. When he’s finally sent home from war, he goes in search of the woman in the photo – and finds her, of course. But will he tell her why he’s really there? Will there be lots of miscommunications and drama and steamy kisses that leave little to the imagination despite its PG-13 rating? You betcha! It’s a Nicholas Sparks book-turned-movie!

So – bottom line. If you’re a fan of Nicholas Sparks books-turned-movies, or you think Zac Efron is hot, then don’t let those Rotten Apples at Rotten Tomatoes spoil your fun. And if you’re not a fan of Sparks and/or Efron, then definitely take a pass.

Salmon Fishing in the Yemen

Emily Blunt (The Young Victoria, The Devil Wears Prada) plays Harriet, a British public relations executive who is given carte blanche to help a wealthy sheik realize his dream of bringing salmon fishing to the desert. She turns to the UK’s leading fisheries expert, Dr. Alfred Jones (Ewan McGregor) for help, but he finds the entire project completely absurd. So does the British government – until the Prime Minister’s press secretary (played by Kristin Scott Thomas) decides that the salmon project is just what the government needs to divert attention from another Middle East ‘project’ that isn’t going so well – the war in Afghanistan.

As the eccentric sheik eventually points out, the project isn’t just about fish. And neither is the movie. It’s about politics, diplomacy, cultural divides, and the hint of romance between the optimistic Harriet and the skeptical Dr. Jones.

The film has its flaws. The Sheik’s character (played by Amr Waked) is all over the place. One minute, he’s a cartoonish stereotype, and the next he’s a complex and sympathetic man on a mission – to bring peace, water, and lots of salmon to the people of Yemen.

But despite the occasional unevenness of character and tone, Salmon Fishing offers up a nice mix of drama, humor, sarcasm, cynicism, and inspiration. Hey, anything is possible – as long as you’ve got enough money, resources… and faith!

Salmon Fishing in the Yemen isn’t terribly deep or dark, which is probably why I liked it (and why I’m a Mainstream rather than an Arty Chick). It’s beautifully shot, well-acted, and well-paced (not too surprising, coming from the director of Chocolat and the Oscar-winning screenwriter of Slumdog Millionaire). And most important, it’ll leave you smiling – and perhaps wondering where Yemen is on the map. Look it up. I did.

This Means War

Chris Pine (Star Trek, Unstoppable) and Tom Hardy (Inception,Warrior) play CIA agents whose brotherly bond is tested when they fall for the same girl, played by chick-flick veteran Reese Witherspoon (Water for Elephants, Legally Blonde, Sweet Home Alabama). She, in turn, falls for both of them – unaware that they know each other and are using the tools of their trade to surveil and sabotage her romantic encounters.

As Lauren struggles to pick one guy over the other, her best friend – played by Chelsea Handler (for all intents and purposes, as herself) – offers a myriad of crude, crass and comical advice. The love triangle turns dangerous for everybody when a bad guy with a grudge against FDR (Pine) and Tuck (Hardy) tracks them down to Los Angeles, where the obligatory gunfight and car chase ensues. Thus, the action-adventure part.

The plot is thin. The acting is shallow. And I don’t really buy Witherspoon’s character ending up with either of these guys. But what can I say? I still kinda liked it. Chalk it up to the post-Oscar-nom February Fluff Factor. And the eye candy.

The Vow stars Channing Tatum (Dear John, Step Up 2) and Rachel McAdams (The Time Traveler’s Wife, Morning Glory) as Leo and Paige, a couple of newlyweds whose vows are put to the test when Paige emerges from a coma with severe memory loss. She does not remember her husband – at all. As Leo struggles to woo Paige all over again, Paige struggles to reconcile a past that she remembers, with a present that’s a total blank.

The ingredients are all there for a classic chick flick, but the batter is only half-baked. Tatum and McAdams are cute and endearing early on, but the chemistry between them fizzles as the storyline takes some turns that feel predictable, forced, or unconvincing.

The Vow is inspired by a true story, so that’s enough to amp up the sap factor and keep you rooting for the couple – in real life as well as on-screen. But don’t be too quick to drag your Valentine to this one. You’ll both have more fun at the shallow but more entertaining This Means War (a romantic action comedy with sneak previews on Valentine’s Day and opening nationwide on Friday).

Joyful Noise

The two women rarely see eye-to-eye, and it gets even worse when G.G’s rebellious grandson Randy (Jeremy Jordan) comes to town and sets his romantic sights on Vi’s “good girl” daughter Olivia (Kiki Palmer).

Ultimately, everyone must work together to achieve harmony if they are to have a prayer of winning the prestigious Joyful Noise national church choir competition in Los Angeles. The whole town is counting on them. Can they do it?

If you have a little faith in Hollywood endings, you probably know the answer.

Based on a book and a stage play and a real life story, the film tells the tale of a young Russian woman named Sabina Spielrein (Keira Knightley) who arrives kicking and screaming at the Swiss hospital where Dr. Jung practices in 1904. She is in desperate need of help for a whole slew of severe neuroses. His treatment is the new “talking cure,” and it turns out she is no mere hysteric, but a very intelligent girl who hopes to become a doctor and is very curious about these new techniques in the emerging field of psychoanalysis. After Jung treats and cures her, she heads to the university and an intellectual relationship blossoms, but then sparked by their discussions of Freud’s ideas about sexual repression, it turns into a passionate affair. It is doomed, of course, to fail. He is married with a rich wife and several children, and she is a former patient and a Jew.

And while this relationship is evolving, Jung is developing his most important relationship. As his treatment of Sabina moves forward, he corresponds and debates with his dear friend and mentor in Vienna, the great psychologist Sigmund Freud (Viggo Mortensen). He is at first sure that Freud is wrong about every neurosis having a sexual cause. But as he gets to know Sabina he learns that she was not simply abused, but she became aroused by the humiliation. And as the relationship between the two pioneers of modern psychoanalysis develops, a rivalry emerges. Early on Jung refers to Freud as his “father figure.” Freud’s theories were revolutionary and he was happy to have younger doctors taking up his cause, but when Jung begins to assert his own ideas, Freud is at first disparaging, and ultimately unable to sustain the friendship, resulting in a break-up that deeply wounds both men.

David Cronenberg (Dead Ringers, The Fly, Crash) is not known for making restrained movies, but A Dangerous Method possesses a subdued, intelligent elegance. Except for Keira Knightley’s early grotesque histrionics, and a bit of naughty spanking, the film is mostly fascinating conversation and beautiful locations. The performances are all stellar, including a few manic scenes with Vincent Cassel (Black Swan) playing a patient who believes that sexual repression is the greatest sin. With A History of Violence and Eastern Promises, and now this beautifully subtle piece of film making, I think Cronenberg has moved into his intelligent adult period, and I cannot wait for his next one.

[I think we can all be grateful for scheduling conflicts. Christoph Waltz was initially cast as Sigmund Freud, but was replaced by Viggo Mortensen. Christian Bale had been in talks to play Carl Jung, and the role of Sabina Spielrein in the screenplay was written for Julia Roberts.]

Garry Marshall is brilliant. He made a mildly entertaining movie with an A-List cast and a name that virtually guarantees it a place in holiday rerun history. [New Year’s Eve] is like Crash-light. Really, really, really light. It follows a bunch of folks whose lives intersect in various ways as they [embrace, reject, and reflect on all that is New Year’s Eve as the ball is about to drop in New York City].

The cast is a virtual who’s who of stars from the big and small screen – including [Hillary Swank, Robert De Niro, Sarah Jessica Parker, Josh Duhamel, rocker Jon Bon Jovi, Halle Berry, Katherine Heigl, Zac Efron, Michelle Pfeifer], Jessica Biel, Ashton Kutcher, Lea Michele, Hector Elizondo… Need I go on?

There’s no real way to review the storyline without giving too much away. All I can say is the movie is enjoyable enough, if not particularly deep. Director Garry Marshall knows how to deliver a solid mainstream chick flick. And as a fellow Northwestern alum, it’s always fun to spot his quick nod to our alma mater – in this case [if there was one, I somehow missed it!]. It’s also worth sticking around for the end credits. Among the outtakes – a fun, little salute to [Valentine’s Day].

Watching [New Year’s Eve] is like watching a special, star-studded edition of The Love Boat. If that floats your boat, then go and enjoy.

There ya have it. A re-purposed review that matches a re-purposed premise that – if it does well enough at the box office – will surely spark yet another entry into the star-studded holiday “franchise”. Place your bets now for Christmas Day, Hanukkah Nights, Labor Day, Memorial Day, Veterans Day, Columbus Day…

The couple is Jacob (Yelchin) and Anna (Jones). They meet at a university in California where she is studying English and he is learning furniture design. She leaves a vaguely stalkerish note on his car and they meet for coffee. They bond over Paul Simon’s Graceland album (seems an odd choice, but okay) and quickly become a couple. The connection between them is powerful. Then senior year is almost up and they wonder “What are we going to do after we graduate?” What she should do is go back to England where she’s from so that she doesn’t overstay her student visa. But, matters of the heart trump legal matters for her and she stays. Too bad love doesn’t actually conquer all – especially immigration law. When she takes a quick trip back to the UK and then tries to return to the U.S. and Jacob, Anna isn’t allowed back into the country. This is when things get difficult.

She can’t resolve her immigration issues and he can’t/won’t give up his furniture business to move to England. So what are they to do? They text, he visits, they both fall into other more convenient relationships. He with a California blonde played by Jennifer Lawrence (who will most likely become a household name come March when The Hunger Games hit theaters). She with a yuppie Brit named Simon. As the months and years go by, Anna and Jacob drift apart and back together trying to figure out if they can overcome all the obstacles and whether this thing they have is really worth the effort.

It’s a fine little love story, well acted and directed. But like I said I just didn’t care about the couple. In fact, they kind of annoyed me. Her heartfelt poetry… His block-like furniture… Graceland? Really? One thing I did admire was Anna’s penchant for single malt whisky. I left the theater wanting a scotch. And one of the reasons I didn’t want to leave early to get one was the movie only runs 90 minutes. I can put up with anything for 90 minutes. I suspect if you consider yourself a romantic, you may enjoy this one more than I did. So don’t let me put you off it completely. I’d say get it on pay-per-view or Netflix when it’s available and you’re in the mood for some sappy romance, and pour yourself a scotch.

I have my favorite movie of the year now, and I expect that The Artist will be at the top of a lot of other reviewers’ lists, too. I’ve been told I gush about it. And I do not gush often. Considering that it is in black & white and is a silent film, you might wonder why.

I will admit to being a lover of older movies, particularly those from the 30s. And so, obviously, is the writer/director of The Artist, Michel Hazanavicius. In the same way Woody Allen’s Midnight in Paris is a love letter to Paris, The Artist is an adoring ode to classic Hollywood. It is brimming with visual references to the great movies and movie stars from the early days of cinema, and the gloriously shot black & white imagery harkens back to an era when movie sets were works of art. Being a silent film, the soundtrack is in itself a character and I cannot imagine a better choice of period music along with several bits of whimsy. There is even a little dog with a big personality that would make Asta green with envy.

But what makes this movie really shine is the performance of the artist himself, Jean Dujardin, playing the central character George Valentin. You cannot help but absolutely love this man. What a face! Valentin is a huge silent film star as the movie begins. But it is 1927 and the talkie has come to town, and he is trying desperately to remain on top, while refusing to bow to the new technology.

Enter Peppy Miller (Bérénice Bejo), a pretty young starlet on the rise, and you have the makings of a wonderful, sweet, sad, funny, surprising, and unbelievably affecting story. Yes, even without (or maybe because of the lack of) dialogue, you are captivated from beginning to end.

I remember in film school they taught us that the essence of filmmaking is telling a story in pictures. And boy, has Michel Hazanavicius done it here! It is really hard to describe, but you must go and see for yourself. Dujardin won the Best Actor prize at Cannes, and the film got a 20-minute standing ovation. I am not surprised in the least. I saw it at a festival and it is opening in limited release later this month. It is a French film, shot in Hollywood, so I have no idea if it will be eligible for The Oscar or has to make do winning the Best Foreign language category, but The Artist will undoubtedly be one of the films everyone is talking about. Genius!

Also starring John Goodman, James Cromwell, Malcolm McDowell, Penelope Ann Miller and a slew of other great modern Hollywood stars.