Battleship is “inspired by” the classic naval combat board game by Hasbro. That explains why there’s no real plot or character development. Just your good ol’ fashioned heroes (go Navy!) and villains (Aliens, go home!).

The movie is like a bizarre mish-mash of Top Gun, Independence Day and Transformers, without any big movie stars (except for Liam Neeson, who adds a touch of gravitas to the cast but only appears for about 10 minutes. false advertising!).

Battleship stars Taylor Kitsch (Friday Night Lights) as Alex Hopper, a perennial screw-up who oozes charm and untapped potential. In an effort to force him to grow up, his older, responsible brother Commander Stone Hopper (True Blood’s Alexander Skarsgård) single-handedly drafts Alex into the Navy. Next thing you know, Alex is a Lieutenant, engaged to the Admiral’s daughter (“swimsuit model-turned-actress” Brooklyn Decker) and conducting naval exercises next to singer Rihanna (okay, so she doesn’t really play herself but, whatever.)

To make a long (inconsequential) story short, Alex must step up to the plate to save the world when an alien force drops in for a visit and cuts a path of destruction on land and at sea with flying ball-shaped things that go kaboom.

It has a blaring soundtrack, lots of eye candy, and cheesy dialogue that’s fit (enough) for a mindless almost-summer action-adventure sci-fi flick. I can’t recommend spending 10 bucks or more on it. But if you must go (and if you’ve already seen the far superior Avengers movie), just keep your expectations in check… and figure that it’s probably better than What to Expect When You’re Expecting (see Adventurous Chick’s review of that one).

The movie also features a host of other reluctant heroes from the Marvel Comic Universe, including the Shakespearean thunder god Thor (Chris Hemsworth), the recently defrosted World War Two soldier-extraordinaire, Captain America (Chris Evans), the mild-mannered doctor-turned-green-monster-when-he’s-angry The Hulk (Mark Ruffalo), the brooding guy who’s good with arrows, Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner), and the psychologically damaged superspy chick in a form-fitting bodysuit, Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson).

They’re called into action by Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson), the persuasive head of an international spy agency known as S.H.I.E.L.D., to retrieve some little blue box of energy called The Tesseract and save the world from an army of aliens led by Thor’s evil adopted brother Loki. I’ve gotta admit, the plot kinda lost me. But it really didn’t matter. The Avengers has a kick-ass cast and it’s a ton of fun watching the mish-mash of superheroes spar with each other, physically and verbally, then have each other’s backs – sort of – when the obligatory epic battle scenes commence. Go Team!?

The interactions between Captain America and Iron Man, between Iron Man and Thor, and between Thor and The Hulk provide the bulk of the entertainment. And Loki (Tom Hiddleston) makes for a quirky and engaging villain. Hawkeye and Black Widow definitely take a back seat in this one (and it’s easy to see why their characters don’t have their own movie franchises.)

The Avengers is written and directed by the uber-talented Joss Whedon, who knows how to make a well-paced crowd-pleaser. The movie is nearly two and a half hours long, but time – like Iron Man – flies. I’m not sure the 3D added all that much, but it’s definitely worth trying to see it in IMAX, or at least on a really big screen.

Bottom line: Even if you don’t know a Loki from a gnocchi, The Avengers is good for a solid cinematic escape.

Be sure and stick around for the end-credits, especially if you’re a comic book geek. There’s a small hint of what’s to come. Because – duh – the studios are already working on a sequel. And did I mention that Iron Man 3 is due out May 3, 2013… the Thor sequel on Nov. 13, 2013… and Captain America 2 in April 2014?  But first, we’ve got to get through the next Batman, Spiderman and Superman sequels and reboots! Ah, summer. Bring it on!

May the odds be ever in your favor

The premise is admittedly bizarre. Every year, a teenage boy and girl from the 12 districts of Panem are sent to the Capitol to compete in a nationally televised, fight-to-the-death competition known as The Hunger Games. The Games were created as punishment for an uprising against the Capital decades earlier – and perpetuated as a way to keep the districts in line. Think of the 12 Districts as home to the 99 percent. The Capitol houses the 1 percent.

The Games’ participants, known as Tributes, must fight one another until one survivor remains. And just like Texas with the Miss America pageant, some tributes are better prepped than others for the competition.

The heroine of The Hunger Games is Katniss Evergreen, played with an impressive mix of fear, stoicism, sarcasm, bravery and cunning by the very talented Jennifer Lawrence (Winter’s Bone). Katniss volunteers for the brutal competition in order to spare her little sister Prim – so you can’t help but root for her from the get-go. But these games aren’t just about winning. They’re about the lines we draw – and the lines we cross – in an effort to survive, and our willingness or reluctance to challenge the status quo. The books and the movie are tinged with themes of war, politics, morality, ethics, desensitization to violence and absurdity, and the role of reality television in feeding the frenzy. It’s also just good storytelling/drama. 

Here’s the rub:  I loved the first book (“The Hunger Games”), liked the second one (“Catching Fire”) and was less than satisfied with the third (“Mockingjay”). So I’m a bit concerned with how it might all play out in the end. But first thing’s first…

The Hunger Games movie is well cast and beautifully shot. I had some trouble warming up to Josh Hutcherson (The Kids Are All Right) as Katniss’s fellow tribute and potential ally/love interest Peeta. But he grew on me as the movie progressed. And I definitely look forward to seeing more of the hunky Liam Hemsworth (The Last Song) as Katniss’s long-time friend, hunting partner and potential love interest Gale. Other casting coups of note: Stanley Tucci as the colorful emcee of the Games, Elizabeth Banks as the flaky tribute chaperone Effie Trinket, and Woody Harrelson as drunken mentor Haymitch Abernathy. They add a strong shot of color and humor to the twisted proceedings.

Parents, be forewarned however. This movie is PG-13. Kids do kill kids. The violence is tempered with quick cuts and montages, but it’s still the stuff of nightmares. That said, if you’ve read the books, you’re going to see the movies. It’s really as simple as that. I highly recommend reading the trilogy beforehand to help plug in holes in character development and recognize the bits of foreshadowing. But reading the books is not mandatory. The Hunger Games can still hold its own for the general audience – including those adults who don’t want to be caught reading “teen lit” and still don’t ‘get’ the whole Twilight thing.

Bottom line: The odds will ever be in favor of this trilogy meeting hyper-expectations and selling oodles of tickets over the next few years. And did I mention that Taylor Swift is on the soundtrack? Cue the record sales. The book sales. And the box office.

Normally, I’d embed the trailer below. But the studios must have blocked the embedding option in their efforts to fan the flames of anticipation. Oh well. You can see it on YouTube if you’re really desperate. http://youtu.be/RNxb28j5C1w

In the meantime, in the spirit of rebellion, I offer this up instead:

Perhaps what the sisters have in common is that they see life on earth now as particularly hopeless. Justine’s melancholy is internal. Claire’s is from above. The opening sequence lets the audience in on the truth, that the mysterious blue planet that is hurtling towards the earth will indeed be our end, but until the moment it happens, there is always the faint hope that it will, as Claire’s astronomer husband John (Keifer Sutherland) keeps insisting, pass us by. It is a strange movie in that this planet that spells our doom is simply a given, but there is nothing else to hint at science fiction. There is no government agency scrambling to find a way to save the earth. In fact, the entire film takes place on an isolated estate somewhere on some coast – a mansion, stables, and, John’s pride and joy, an 18-hole golf course.

The film opens with a very arty sequence (think Tree of Life) depicting the sisters in strange tableaux around the estate, some is such extreme slow motion as to be nearly still, culminating with a planet crashing into earth. This is none too subtle foreshadowing of the strange and strained tale that is to come. There is a sense from the beginning that nothing quite fits here. When we meet Justine, she and her new husband are in the back of a stretch limo, which cannot navigate a tight turn and despite trying every conceivable approach, it is just stuck. She seems happy and fun, but it becomes clear at the reception that she is in desperate need of emotional aid and despite pleas to both her parents, she gets less than nothing. Claire seems mostly concerned with having the affair run on time, though it is obvious that she is the only person who understands what is happening with Justine and will take care of her. In the Claire chapter, a nearly catatonic Justine returns to stay at the mansion and is nursed back to mental health, just in time to help über-anxious Claire cope with the end of the world.

Melancholia is definitely not a mainstream film. But there is a lot to like about it, including wonderful acting from both lead actresses. So far, Kirsten Dunst has gotten a lot of kudos (Best Actress at Cannes), but I think Charlotte Gainsbourg deserves a few nods, as well. And the supporting cast is excellent. I particularly liked seeing Keifer in a non-Jack Bauer role for a change. Visually this film is stunning! The opening sequence is mesmerizing and who’d have thought a golf course could become such a magical landscape? But at the end of the day, it is a very depressing film. You need to be in the mood for an Art Film, because ultimately Melancholia is all about futility, though neatly wrapped in a gorgeously shot and beautifully acted package.

I won’t bother delving too much into the plot, because it will just propel the non-Twihards among you to wonder how and why the “young adult” novels by Stephenie Meyer grew to such Potter-esque proportions. It is what it is, people.

Breaking Dawn picks up where Eclipse left off. Eighteen-year-old Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) and her immortal boyfriend, the intense but charming vampire Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) tie the knot. Bella gets pregnant on their honeymoon and the ‘baby’ grows at an accelerated pace, feeding off the ever-weakening Bella, and triggering a potential war between the vampire clan and the local werewolves whose pack includes Bella’s best friend Jacob (Taylor Lautner). Jacob remains ever-protective of Bella despite his hate for all things vampire. I know – it’s absurd. But every time Jacob rips off his shirt and leaps into werewolf mode, you can almost forgive the cheesy, stilted, so-bad-it’s-funny acting that often fills the screen.

This particular movie is simply a means to an end – the end being Bella’s transition to life as a vampire. For the rest of the story, you’ll have to wait for Breaking Dawn – Part Two, hitting theaters just in time for Thanksgiving 2012. Twihards, save the date. As for the rest of ya – don’t be hatin’ or criticizin’ or mockin’ (too much). Just skip it and move on, knowing it’ll all be over soon.

For the two-and-a-half minute version of the entire movie, watch the official trailer:

It’s about the “haves” and “have-nots” in a future world where time is – literally – money. Everything is bought and sold in units of time: minutes, hours, days, months, years. So a cup of Joe might cost ya four minutes… a nice car could set you back a few years… and there’s a “99 seconds only” store on the corner. Get it?

Oh, here’s the big catch: Everyone is genetically engineered to stop aging at 25. Then a clock embedded in their forearm starts ticking down. If it zeroes out, they drop dead. So folks need to make more “time” to survive.

Justin Timberlake stars as Will Salas, an inherently good guy who lives “day to day” in the equivalent of a futuristic ghetto. When he suddenly comes into a whole lot of time, he also becomes a wanted fugitive. Though on the run, Will is determined to challenge a system that basically decrees, “For a few to be immortal, many must die”. In other words, the “one percent” is golden. The other 99 have a rough go of it. Sound familiar?

Timberlake rocks this role, proving he can do much more than romantic comedy, SNL skits, singing and dancing (all of which he does remarkably well – it’s really not fair). He is at once sympathetic, empathetic, endearing, mysterious, serious, cocky, cute and charming – even when he’s taking a rich, rebellious and beautiful young woman (Amanda Seyfried) hostage at gunpoint.

Click here to watch the official trailer

It’s a little bizarre to watch a movie where everybody looks approximately the same age regardless of their relationship to one another (Olivia Wilde plays Timberlake’s mother. How creepy is that?). But you get used to it. The movie has some flaws. But overall, it’s a nice mix of drama, humor, action and eye candy, and it manages to tackle some heavy issues without being too heavy-handed. So for a PG-13 sci-fi twist on our own twisted reality, consider “Occupying Theaters” for In Time. For 110 minutes. Or 10 bucks.

The less you try and learn about the movie going in, the more you’ll enjoy the ride. So I’ll keep the strokes broad enough not to ruin the plot. Cowboys & Aliens starts out like a fairly classic western, with Craig’s character waking up in Arizona Territory in 1873, unsure of who he is or how he got there. He’s got a bloody wound on his abdomen and a mysterious shackle on his wrist, indicating perhaps he is an escaped convict. He’s also a mighty fine gunslinger.

The guy stumbles into the town of Absolution, which is basically “owned” by a hard-ass named Colonel Dolarhyde (Ford). The two butt heads, but ultimately must come together – along with other townsfolk, a token boy, a token dog, a token woman (Olivia Wilde), and even some Indians – to fight a common enemy that threatens to wipe them out. That enemy would be the aliens – monster-like creatures that come out of nowhere to snatch people up with their fleet of spaceships.

Cowboys & Aliens is a PG-13 action thriller with just enough humor, heart and self-deprecation peppered throughout to tame the intensity of the fight scenes. The script was written by Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci (Star Trek) and Damon Lindelof (Lost), based on a graphic novel by Scott Mitchell Rosenberg. So there’s a definite Trek/Lost vibe goin’ on. The characters are just quirky enough to keep you guessing, and the story is just bizarre enough to hold your interest, even as you think, ‘where is this going?’

So, how do you get someone (like me) who balks at the idea of seeing an alien movie set in the old west to join you for this one? Here’s the pitch: for chicks, there’s the appeal of the naturally-suave Craig, who fills out his cowboy duds quite nicely, thank you very much (though regrettably only goes shirtless once or twice); Ford is fun for the nostalgia factor (there’s a bit of the ol’ Indiana Jones buried in there somewhere); and Wilde (a.k.a. “13” on House) delivers some (cow)girl power along with the eye candy.

What can I say? I was pleasantly surprised.

Captain America: The First Avenger is the latest in a string of superhero movies flooding the box office this summer. And that is its biggest obstacle: comic-book hero overkill. As much as I, um, admire actor Chris Evans’ body of work as Captain America, I wasn’t as enamored with the overall story as I was with X-Men: First Class. The two movies have quite a bit in common, including roots in the World War II/Nazi era as the set-up for a whole new wave of crime-fighting superheroes.

Captain America: The First Avenger takes place in 1941, as war is raging overseas. A scrappy, 98-pound New Yorker named Steve Rogers (Evans) is eager to enlist in the U.S. Army to help fight the bad guys, but he keeps getting rejected because of his scrawny frame and a myriad of health issues. That is, until a government scientist (Stanley Tucci) sees in Rogers the essence of a hero who, with the help of an experimental super-secret muscle-building serum, could become the Allies’ greatest weapon. Rogers readily agrees to be the serum’s human test pilot, and next thing ya know, the noble misfit is a noble hottie with super-speed, super-strength and a big round protective shield developed by none other than Howard Stark (Dominic Cooper) a.k.a. the father of future superhero/Avenger “Iron Man.”

The movie is a bit campy, reminiscent of the 1970s Wonder Woman television series (where is that movie, by the way!?), as “Captain America” and his fellow soldiers are tasked with bringing down the evil HYDRA organization, the Nazi’s deep science division led by Red Skull (Hugo Weaving), who’s basically out to destroy the world.

Captain America: The First Avenger is an entertaining enough ride if you’re into all the superhero flicks. But don’t feel compelled to rush out and see this one (showing in 3D and IMAX of course), unless you already have your calendars marked for May 4, 2012. That’s when The Avengers movie is slated for release – featuring the best of the best from the Marvel superhero universe, including Captain America, Thor, Iron Man, and others. One thing’s for sure – that one should be worth the price of admission, for the eye candy alone.

If you’ve read the books, you know how the plot unfolds – and how it ends. I’ve only seen the movies (shame on me, I know), so I can’t tell you how faithful (or not) the cinematic sequences are to author J.K. Rowling’s written word. But I can tell you that everyone I saw it with – including many who’d read the books – were extremely satisfied with how it all played out.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past decade, you know that the movie’s lead actors have grown up with- and in- their roles: Daniel Radcliffe as Harry, Rupert Grint as Ron Weasley, and Emma Watson as Hermione Granger. It’s hard to watch Part Two and not wonder what was going through their heads as they filmed their final scenes together. It definitely adds to the emotional impact of the movie.

While Part One was almost ‘chick flicky’ in its relationship-centric themes and sweeping landscapes, Part Two is all about action – and answers.

As the epic adventure draws to a close, the battle between the forces of good and evil in the wizard world escalates into all-out war and everyone is in jeopardy, especially Harry, who is faced with making the ultimate sacrifice in his final showdown with Lord Voldemort (Ralph Fiennes).

Fringe fans of Harry Potter (i.e. the less obsessed) will likely benefit from a cursory read of one of the gazillions of online primers – for an overview or refresher course in the colorful cast of characters, the backstory, and a glossary of terms like  “elder wand” and “horcruxes”.

If you haven’t seen any of the previous seven movies over the past 10 years, then don’t expect this one to “stand alone” and still make sense. It’s the final chapter of a very long book filled with twists and turns and a language all its own. That’s not to say there isn’t room for a spin-off or two (or seven). After all, what movie exec would dare shut the door entirely on the most successful movie franchise of all time?

But for now, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part Two provides a fitting end to a fantastical journey for millions of muggles young and old.

It’s PG-13 (for the typical darkness that Deathly Hallows might bring), runs a very respectable 130 minutes, and is the first Potter movie to be released in both 3D and 2D. Personally, I think 2D is the better way to go – unless you need the glasses to hide those misty eyes. Bye, Harry.

Super 8

The movie takes place in a small Ohio town in the summer of 1979. A group of friends are out making a zombie movie with a Super 8 camera when they witness an explosive train crash. Once the zombie film’s young “director” gets over how awesome the fiery backdrop is for his film’s “production values”, things take a scary turn. The kids are warned to forget what they saw, the military swoops in to cover up the mystery of the train’s cargo, and strange things start happening in the town.

The movie has a definite Lost meets E.T. vibe –  not too surprising, considering it was written and directed by Lost co-creator J.J. Abrams and produced by Steven Spielberg. Both know the drill when it comes to mixing family drama, action adventure and science fiction into a suspenseful, yet entertaining package.

The movie works in part because of a genuinely likeable cast that includes Kyle Chandler (Friday Night Lights) as a deputy sheriff determined to uncover the cover-up, Joel Courtney as his son Joe, Elle Fanning as the only “actor” in the zombie film who can actually act, and Riley Griffiths as the director wannabe who takes his craft very seriously. The Griffiths character – who must have more than just a little of a young J.J. Abrams in him – definitely provides the bulk of the movie’s comic relief.

Super 8 isn’t my favorite movie of the year. Some things didn’t quite track (gee, just like Lost!), and the ending was a bit corny for my taste. But overall, it does make for a nice, harmless diversion on a hot summer day. And the soundtrack includes Blondie’s “Heart of Glass.” I mean, really, what more could you ask for nostalgia-wise?

And finally, take note: Don’t – under any circumstances- skip the end credits! They’re classic.

Super 8 is rated PG-13 for some intense sequences of sci-fi action and violence, language and a pot-smoking dude.