I just re-read my review of Garry Marshall’s easy breezy chick flick of last year, Valentine’s Day, and guess what? I could easily just change out the holiday – and some of the names from the lengthy A-list cast – and present the exact same review. In fact, just for fun, that’s what I’m gonna do! So here goes, with only slight [modifications]:
Garry Marshall is brilliant. He made a mildly entertaining movie with an A-List cast and a name that virtually guarantees it a place in holiday rerun history. [New Year’s Eve] is like Crash-light. Really, really, really light. It follows a bunch of folks whose lives intersect in various ways as they [embrace, reject, and reflect on all that is New Year’s Eve as the ball is about to drop in New York City].
The cast is a virtual who’s who of stars from the big and small screen – including [Hillary Swank, Robert De Niro, Sarah Jessica Parker, Josh Duhamel, rocker Jon Bon Jovi, Halle Berry, Katherine Heigl, Zac Efron, Michelle Pfeifer], Jessica Biel, Ashton Kutcher, Lea Michele, Hector Elizondo… Need I go on? 
There’s no real way to review the storyline without giving too much away. All I can say is the movie is enjoyable enough, if not particularly deep. Director Garry Marshall knows how to deliver a solid mainstream chick flick. And as a fellow Northwestern alum, it’s always fun to spot his quick nod to our alma mater – in this case [if there was one, I somehow missed it!]. It’s also worth sticking around for the end credits. Among the outtakes – a fun, little salute to [Valentine’s Day].
Watching [New Year’s Eve] is like watching a special, star-studded edition of The Love Boat. If that floats your boat, then go and enjoy.
There ya have it. A re-purposed review that matches a re-purposed premise that – if it does well enough at the box office – will surely spark yet another entry into the star-studded holiday “franchise”. Place your bets now for Christmas Day, Hanukkah Nights, Labor Day, Memorial Day, Veterans Day, Columbus Day…
And notice there’s ONE person of color on the poster? Yeah, one and a half, if you count Halle.I’m tired of seeing movies about the white middle class bitching about their lives and then falling in love at the end and all is well. No matter how many white stars you put into it, life isn’t like these movies. Marshall is not in touch with today’s moviegoer. These movies are not poignant and they’re not entertaining.
My suggestion: the next holiday movie needs to be a collaboration of Garry Marshall and Tyler Perry. Let’s get some Terrence Howard and Idris Elba up in there and maybe I’ll go see it!